Mutual Acquiantances
by TheDoublemintTwins11
Summary: Zoro spends a night in jail after wasting his only phone call. Ace and Luffy show up at the station the next day, though they didn't come for Zoro. :ZoLu: :SmoAce: :AU:


**DMTwins: Hey, this is a collab. we did with KLS. It was **_**supposed**_** to be mainly humor with a little ZoLu, but she has poisoned our minds, so some SmoAce managed to sneak it's way into the story as well… -laughs sheepishly- anyway, enjoy the story.**

**KLS: -enters the gates that lead to the OP fandom with wide eyes- This place is scary…. -cowers- BUT! I have a somewhat responsible guide, so I **_**think **_**I'll be okay. I hope. Hi everyone! ^.^ I'm Kei (I**__**did the ending… O.o) And don't worry! I haven't completely poisoned them, and there's plenty of ZoLu to go around! Have fun—**

**Mutual Acquaintances**

-**DMTwins &** **KLS**-

Zoro rode in silence, glaring at the scenery as it flashed past the window. He glanced up toward the driver through the wire mesh separating the back seat from the front. Officer Smoker was matching his silence, though he looked thoroughly more annoyed than Zoro, despite the fact that Zoro was the one being arrested. Not that he minded.

Zoro had gone out to have a couple drinks after work. Originally, he had intended to go to Makino's bar, but it didn't seem to be in the same place as it was the last time he went, so he'd resorted to going to the first bar he'd come across.

It wasn't exactly the cleanest place on earth, nor was the company the best, but the booze was cheap and it didn't taste awful, so it was as good a place as any. He'd managed to sit in silence for a few drinks, but after his third shot some guy—Zoro had assumed he was a regular—walked up and demanded that he move out of 'his seat'. Zoro did, he didn't really want to fight the guy, and he was going to leave soon anyway.

But that stupid guy and his friends were itching for a fight. After some name-calling and a few drunken punches Zoro sent the first through a table, which seemed to trigger a chain reaction. A half an hour and thirty late-night drinkers later, Zoro was the last one standing, and therefore, the only one who wasn't just given a fine and a slap on the wrist. Then again, he was also the only one who wasn't sent to the hospital, so it sort of evened out.

They pulled into the station and Zoro glowered as he was being lead inside—not because he was angry, but because he wanted the other inmates to think he was angry. They were more likely to leave him alone that way. He led him to an old phone toward the back of the building.

"One phone call." Smoker said. Zoro nodded and dialed Ace's phone number. Of all the people Zoro knew, Ace was the most likely to be awake and willing to come bail him out at this hour.

"Hello?" Zoro almost groaned outright at voice on the other end, and had he not wanted to save Luffy's feelings, he would have.

"Hey kid, get your brother." Zoro paused before adding, "I'm at the police station."

"The police station? What are you doing there…did you get lost or something?" Zoro rolled his eyes. It was just like him to not make the connection. "Well, Ace isn't here. He went out to go buy something with Sanji. They're making dinner!" Luffy said excitedly. Zoro glanced over at Smoker, who was looking a bit impatient.

"A bit late, isn't it? Anyway, go get a pen and some paper, then. I've got a message for you to give to him when he get's back." Zoro said. There was muffled shuffling and slamming drawers on the other end before a satisfied:

"Aha! Okay, I'm ready." Just as Zoro was about to start explaining he was cut off by what sounded like the front door opening. "Hooray! Food's here! Sorry, Zoro, gotta go. It's time to eat."

"No, don't hang up! You need to tell—" Zoro was cut off by the dial tone. He held the phone in front of him and glared at the mouthpiece, as though it would reach Luffy if he glared hard enough. Seeing this, Smoker cut in.

"Okay, phone call's done. To your cell." Smoker said.

"But he didn't even get the message." Zoro protested.

"I'm sure your friend is competent enough to tell his brother." He replied.

"If you knew him you wouldn't be so sure."

"Yeah, well, one call means one call. You can try again tomorrow…probably." And at that Smoker shooed him off to go follow one of the lower-ranking officer's to his cell. Zoro stalked into his cell, this time actually pissed off, and threw himself onto one of the bunks. The protest from the inmate who had previously been sleeping there was cut off by a silent glare. Zoro was going to be pissed if someone didn't come to bail him out soon.

---

Ace and Luffy walked in through the front door of the police station. Despite the fact that no one without a badge was allowed beyond the front desk they walked past. Ace never did like that rule anyway. Ace was holding a plastic sack with lunch for Luffy, his boyfriend, and himself.

Luffy was looking around wide-eyed, even though he'd been down the same hallway plenty of times. He waved enthusiastically to every officer he recognized, and even some he didn't, unaware that what they were doing was trespassing. Besides, it's not like Smoker would let them get in trouble for it. Ace flung open the door to Smoker's office. He startled Officer Tashigi, who was sitting in one of the guest chairs, but Smoker remained unfazed.

"We brought food, babe!" Ace said. Tashigi blushed and excused herself, not wanting to impose, and Ace chuckled in her wake. Luffy looked uninterested in the display, instead attacking the first of five helpings Ace had bought for him. "She gets embarrassed easily, doesn't she?" He asked.

"You're not wearing a shirt." Smoker pointed out.

"Yeah, well I never wear a shirt, and she never seems to get over it." Ace said. He took Smoker's lunch from the stack that Luffy had been making and handed it to him. "So, anything new?" Smoker shrugged.

"Nothing much, although there was this one guy that came in last night…Beat the shit out of a bar full of people."

"Impressive." Ace said, "What does he look like?"

"He's pretty young, I guess. Not near as big as some of the guy's he sent to the hospital, but he was tough… oh, he had this green hair—" Ace choked on his food and Luffy started laughing hysterically.

"Zoro's in jail? Luffy?" Ace asked for confirmation. Luffy shrugged.

"Well, he didn't come home last night; I just figured he was lost," Luffy was probably the only person that wouldn't worry when his boyfriend didn't come home, "…but he called you at your apartment while you were out shopping with Sanji. He said he was at the pol…ice… Oh…" Luffy trailed off, realization finally dawning on him. "He's probably pissed, huh?" Luffy asked, his happy-go-lucky attitude once again returning. At that Luffy hurried out of the room to go find him. Ace sighed.

"So…How much is bail, then?"

---

Luffy walked down to the cell block. He waved at the guard and strutted inside. The guard watched him go, but decided that he seemed like he had a purpose and ignored him. Luffy took a deep breath.

"ZORO! WHERE ARE YOU?" He shouted. The guard looked startled by his outburst, many of the inmates were grumbling and shouting at him to shut up, and Luffy could swear that he could hear Ace laughing somewhere else in the building.

"Oi, Luffy! You hung up on me! I only had one phone call, you ass." Zoro waved him over to his cell.

"Ah, sorry about that." Luffy laughed sheepishly. Zoro pressed his forehead against the bars.

"What the hell took you so long?" He asked.

"Well, we actually didn't come to bail you out… Not originally, anyway, we were coming to visit Ace's boyfriend and he started telling this story and—"

"Wait, Ace's boyfriend?" Zoro asked.

"Yeah. He's cool, kind of grumpy… Anyway he was telling us about how you beat the crap out of a bunch of guys last night." Luffy shrugged, "Sorry about, y'know, not coming sooner…" Luffy began inspecting his shoes.

"It's fine." Zoro tilted Luffy's chin up and kissed him lightly. A few chuckles erupted from within the cell, and both Zoro and Luffy turned to them with irritated looks. They quickly fell silent, looking as though they _really_ wanted to be swallowed up by the floor.

The door to the cellblock opened once again, and this time Ace and Smoker entered. Smoker turned to the guard and gestured toward the two. The guard hurried and unlocked the cell. The second the cell opened Luffy threw his arms around Zoro as though he hadn't seen him in days.

Zoro returned the hug, glaring over Luffy's shoulder at the people still in their cells, _daring_ them to say or do anything. They obediently avoided his glare and stuck to the wall as much as they could. Satisfied, he turned his attention to Ace, not at all surprised that he was walking through the police station without a shirt on.

After all, in the time Zoro had known him, Ace had never worn a shirt. He even managed to buy things from department stores without a shirt, the 'No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service' policy most respectable places held being an exception to him. Zoro nodded in greeting.

"Hey Ace! I found Zoro!" Ace smirked.

"That you did," he replied to his younger brother, returning Zoro's silent greeting. "Sorry about not showing up earlier, Zoro," the man shrugged.

"Don't worry about it. So, how much was bail?" Ace opened his mouth and then shut it again, appearing to think something over before shaking his head.

"Don't worry about it," he said, repeating Zoro's words. Zoro frowned and looked like he was going to protest, but Luffy beat him to it.

"Ace, I'm still hungry. Can we go back to eating now?" Ace grinned sheepishly, glancing back at the officer that Zoro recognized as the one who had arrested him, and turned back to Luffy.

"Sure, but why don't you take Zoro and your portion of the food out somewhere while I work out the finer points of his _bail _with Smoker, eh? I'm sure he wants to get out of this place, right Zoro?" Zoro looked between the man, Smoker, and Ace before deciding he didn't want to know what Ace was going to do and nodded.

"Yeah, come on Luffy," Luffy grinned and waved as Zoro dragged him out of the cell block.

"And I do mean _your _portion, Luffy! _Only _your portion!" Luffy's laugh was the only response Ace got. He sighed and looked over at Smoker, who watched the two of them go with a blank expression before turning back to Ace.

"_That's _your brother's boyfriend?" Ace grinned sheepishly before wrapping his arms around Smoker's neck.

"He's not so bad," Ace replied before leaning closer. "So, about that bail,"

"Bribery is a crime, bribery of an officer is even worse," Ace smirked at Smoker's blank expression when they locked eyes.

"If you throw me in jail, you'll be sleeping on the couch."

"I'll have you to myself at the station," Ace's eyes widened slightly.

"You seem to have forgotten the other various vagabonds you have in here, Captain." Smoker glared at the people locked in cells watching them, then at the guard who also seemed to be eyeing them with interest. Ace watched in amusement when they cowered and chuckled as he grabbed Smoker's arm. "Come on, I did come here to eat," Smoker's glare didn't disappear until they left the cell block.

As soon as they had left, Luffy took charge and started dragging Zoro through the station. "Oi, Luffy, how do you know this place so well?" he asked as he was pulled around their sixth corner.

"It's because Ace lets me come around," he waved at a few more police officers before they stopped in front of a closed office door. "We have lunch with that Smokey guy all the time. It's great because I get more than I usually do when we go out!"

"That 'Smokey' guy?" Zoro muttered before glancing at the nameplate of the desk that they had walked into and stopping abruptly. He read it twice before laughing. Luffy, who had been packing up large portions of food into a bag (carefully leaving out only two boxes – one already half-eaten – on the desk) turned abruptly. "You mean _Captain Smoker _is Ace's boyfriend?" Luffy grinned.

"'Course!" he turned and grabbed the bag before turning to go, grabbing Zoro's arm on the way. "Let's hurry up and leave, I'm hungry and Ace had two extra boxes for you." Zoro raised an eyebrow, but didn't comment, opting to let Luffy lead the way. After all, food was food. And if Ace was paying the way Zoro thought he was paying… He wrapped an arm around Luffy's waist as they left. Ace wasn't losing any money.

**Is the layout of the police station weird, or is it just me? Oh well, roll with it… It's not like I've ever been arrested, so I have no experience to base this fic off of. As always, reviews are appreciated!**


End file.
